Climacteric
| Yesterday, I spent two hours stuck in traffic with three kids in the car. The heavy snowfall (and a ton of unprepared drivers) had paralyzed every road in and around Bern, and I couldn’t help but wonder: How come we keep getting surprised by the obvious? «Snow in November?! Who could have guessed? And now I’m shocked—shocked!—that no car mechanic has time to change my tires.» Winter is coming, my friends. So buckle up! And you know what else is coming? (*drumroll – super smooth transition*) Menopause. Yep, also known as climacteric (look at me learning fancy new words). Like it or not—about 50% of the global population will experience it directly, and the other 50% will feel its ripple effects. And boy did I underestimate how soon this can start… (Dear male readers, this newsletter is written from a female perspective, but please—keep reading. This might resonate with your partner, your mother, or someone else close to you.) «Menopause? I’m not even 40 yet—surely not something I need to think about. Trouble sleeping? Okay, yes. Mood swings? Definitely. Gained a little weight? Maybe. Mind going blank a lot? Now that you mention it… But hey, that’s life, right? I probably just need to suck it up and get my act together.» Maybe. But maybe not. You might be in perimenopause—a chaotic transitional phase leading up to menopause. How would you even know? why the hell are we not talking about this? First, there’s the ever-present stigma around aging, particularly for women. Menopause is often associated with the end of youth and vitality, and our society, unfortunately, places enormous value on those qualities. As a result, many women feel compelled to suffer in silence, hesitant to talk about their symptoms for fear of being judged as «less than» or «past their prime.» Then there’s the knowledge gap—an incredible lack of education about menopause. Many women reach this phase of life without a clear understanding of what’s happening to their bodies. And let’s not even get started on how little most men know about it. When something isn’t taught or discussed, it becomes shrouded in mystery, even shame. And finally, let’s talk about discomfort. Menopause involves symptoms—hot flashes, depressive states, changes in libido—that our society has labeled “taboo” to discuss. It’s easier for many of us to avoid the topic entirely than to engage in conversations that might feel awkward or vulnerable. But that avoidance comes at a cost. the price of silence When we don’t talk about menopause, we allow misinformation to thrive. We tend to blame ourselves for symptoms we can’t control or we delay seeking help because we don’t realize what we’re experiencing is entirely normal. Employers overlook ways to support their workforce, and families miss opportunities to empathize and connect. But the most insidious consequence of silence is the isolation it creates. Women navigating (peri)menopause often feel alone, as though they are the only ones going through it. Menopause is an important turning point in life. Like puberty, but backwards. Hormones go haywire. We are questioning our roles as mothers, partners, women. And even if it is recognized early enough, in many cases the main concern is to fix the symptoms, trying to keep our productivity levels high, trying to keep functioning in society. But menopause is not something to fix (although it’s great to know that nowadays, there are several treatments from hormon therapy to antidepressants that can be considered). It’s a deeply transformative phase meant to be embraced and looked at holistically. It requires mental space and loving attention to ourselves – things that women usually don’t live in abundance of… So today, I want to encourage all of you to look into this topic. To monitor yourself for symptoms early on. To check in with your partners, your mothers and friends. To start talking about it with others, so we can be a little less lost and and a little less lonely in this. Warmly, Tanja This text was first published in my monthly though-letter Tanja’s Butterflies (November Edition 2024 ). If you are interested in receiving the next editions in your inbox including additional resources such as inspiring quotes, books and more, you can subscribe here. |
